NewStats: 3,265,513 , 8,187,040 topics. Date: Sunday, 15 June 2025 at 12:52 PM 6v491e

This is a real life story of how my house was broken into—and how the Nigerian Police turned my trauma into a payday.

It happened like a movie scene: my space was violated, belongings stolen, and the culprits long gone. The estate security? Useless (flashfront: The security boss man would be arrested like three months later for theft-related cases). You’d think the worst part was the robbery itself, right? Wrong.

I did what any citizen would do—called the police. But here’s where the real nightmare began. Instead of being the police, I got debt collectors in uniform. First, it was ₦25,000 for ‘mobilization’ (because, apparently, fuel and patriotism don’t mix). The policeman driving was even agitating that he used his own money to top the fuel because the sum I paid wasn't enough because "it is a Hilux"...thereby creating an impression I still had to balance him. Then ₦12,000 (adding unnecessary bills to pile it up like buying some type of papers and settling those who'd sign on it) to open a case file—because justice has a cover charge. Next, ₦15,000 to ‘settle’ the officers who showed up… late.

But wait, it gets wilder. They dragged in a random suspect, after much galavanting, demanded ₦25,000 to bail him—a person they arrested on mere suspicion! Of course, "no evidence to pin him down" would suffice as an excuse. Then came the grand finale: ₦50,000 for ‘tracking equipment’ to find the thieves. I paid all these fees. Spoiler: They found nothing.

Weeks later, they circled back like vultures: ₦150,000 more for ‘logistics’. Oh, and let’s not forget the IPO (Investigating Police Officer) sliding into my DMs for his own ‘share’! I mean using decorated sentences to the message! Like am I sharing money! I just got robbed and instead of helping, they all became infant wide-mouthed eaglets pinching deposits from their mother's becks.

Meanwhile, my gadgets, and peace of mind were long gone. No updates, no leads—just endless invoices, and endless conversation starters: "tomorrow is my birthday, boss", "it's been a while. I just lost my mum", "happy new month. Hope you go flex me this Christmas", "How far that your case? I fit get like ₦20k from you. I'll pay back when salary is paid", "I lost my stepmother, bro. Can I get any from you?"

Like wtf.

I couldn't even see any iota of professionalism in these supposedly trained officers. Let me not even laugh when they came and started picking up some things the guys used to break it and said they'd do some UV scans and biometrics to ascertain the thieves. Laugh won wound me. They even started tagging a ₦60k sum to it so that "their guy from SCID" can run the biometrics.

Imagine my shock when I realized: The real thieves were licensed and legalised with guns. Why should I pay for mobilization? Doesn’t the government fund their patrols? Why pay to open a file? Is justice a VIP lounge? And why the hell was I bankrolling the bail of someone they arrested?

I finally snapped. Told them I wouldn’t pay another kobo until they produced actual results. Know what the officer said? ‘I’ll front my one-month salary to investigate, and you’ll reimburse me.’ The audacity! These guys weren’t solving a crime—they were running a subscription service. Even after blocking their nonstop “anything for the boys?” texts, I couldn’t unsee the truth: The system isn’t broken—it’s rigged.

Now? I get why people choose jungle justice. At least thieves in the wild don’t send you a bill, and one problem solved.

P.S. Still no update on my case till date. This happened since September 2024. But the Nigerian Police? Five-star scammers. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️. Waiting to feast on your circumstances like scavengers without recourse to.

You fit still even catch thief wey come your house carry am go police make dem put you for cell then the culprit go first you commot cell. Real life shit bro. Now imagine that. A thief you arrested coming back to your house with a warning and threat to life! The comeback would be bloody because you'll realise that you had better relocate from that place because dead men tell no tales.

It would surprise you to know that these bribes and extortion they take, they remit to the oga at the top. Forget the televised "we are not aware-ism," they are aware, and they benefit... because they set a figure the junior officers MUST realise.


For example, there was a house I relocated to sometime. Let's assume I relocated in June, NEPA brought a bill for May. I mean a new house o. I questioned why bills for a month not used was given and how the figure was calculated since there was no usage. The official told me that the oga at the top always set a figure to be realised monthly and it's then divided. Prepaid metres may be expensive but it saves you...you no go know sha. Omo, we drag am sha. They threatened to cut the light and I was like "with all pleasure." Since they already saw I had solar s installed, renegotiations began.

Na Nigeria be dat o..... terrible

First, it was ₦25,000 for ‘mobilization’ (because, apparently, fuel and patriotism don’t mix

Then ₦12,000 (adding unnecessary bills to pile it up like buying some type of papers and settling those who'd sign on it) to open a case file

Next, ₦15,000 to ‘settle’ the officers who showed up… late.

They dragged in a random suspect, after much galavanting, demanded ₦25,000 to bail him

Then came the grand finale: ₦50,000 for ‘tracking equipment’ to find the thieves. Spoiler: They found nothing.

Weeks later, they circled back like vultures: ₦150,000 more for ‘logistics’.

You made these payments under duress abi they hypnotized you?

Zonefree:












You made these payments under duress abi they hypnotized you?

Next question?

chatinent:
This is a real life story of how my house was broken into—and how the Nigerian Police turned my trauma into a payday.

It happened like a movie scene: my space was violated, belongings stolen, and the culprits long gone. The estate security? Useless (flashfront: The security boss man would be arrested like three months later for theft-related cases). You’d think the worst part was the robbery itself, right? Wrong.

Imagine my shock when I realized: The real thieves were licensed and legalised with guns. Why should I pay for mobilization? Doesn’t the government fund their patrols? Why pay to open a file? Is justice a VIP lounge? And why the hell was I bankrolling the bail of someone they arrested?

Now? I get why people choose jungle justice. At least thieves in the wild don’t send you a bill, and one problem solved.

P.S. Still no update on my case till date. This happened since September 2024. But the Nigerian Police? Five-star scammers. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️. Waiting to feast on your circumstances like scavengers without recourse to.

You fit still even catch thief wey come your house carry am go police make dem put you for cell then the culprit go first you commot cell.

The new update now is to cripple the thief when caught, put them in wheelchair for life. No need for police. Adapt or perish

Lol. Sweet story.

The first time in my life when I almost wanted to arrest someone who was threatening my life,na only me withdraw my case from police the same day,the same minute cuz the way the wereys in uniform were billing me,I knew I was about to enter a one chance motor

Na once I retrace my steps and had to let the sleeping dog lie..

Zonefree:












You made these payments under duress abi they hypnotized you?

Co ask

Police extortion is relatively low in the North than what is in Southern Nigeria. I pray your hustle open more doors for you.

b3llo:
Police extortion is relatively low in the North than what is in Southern Nigeria. I pray your hustle open more doors for you.

go and live in the Northern part of Nigeria

If you have evidence of this and willing to get back your money, there is a way to go.


Btw, police is not your friend.

The Nigerian Police Force is a criminal organization!

The kind of shege that I've seen in their hands, my mouth can narrate it all. Very heartless people!

This op has been opening threads back to back since yesterday, and for what?

Because I am arranging to get him arrested for aiding and abetting examination malpractice on a huge scale by taking money from students undergoing university studies (bachelors and doctorates) to start and finish their final year project and dissertation topics then handing it over to them to take to their various schools to submit and gain points to and graduate.

He is a very bad person who helps people fake their graduation by using external mercenaries to complete academic work. It is against the law. Nobody should beg on his behalf once his name and story hits this nairaland front page.

If you are one of those who has ever utilized his dubious and criminal services in the past then I'm sorry you will also be swept away by the avalanche that is coming to him.

You had too much money to spare...


That's why you were dashing police free money like Jonny.

The worth of the property lost and cash spent on probably a 20% chance of recovery is how much again?

Check and balance am!

Payment no dey end,u started paying like a dumb white college student.i can't forget when an Indian paid me 6m in 2022.my year of divine breakthrough, omg.my target was 40m,but the client stopped at 8m. U ahoyldnt have paid at all. Deh fuc k.

Those thieves are really not your friend.

I bought a land from a real estate company only, they gave me all relevant documents but kept postponing their allocation. After waiting for more than 7 months, I was advised to get the police involved.

I immediately ed a lawyer who wrote a petition and the case was one IPO.

First thing, they asked me to to pay 250k to mobilize them, I asked my lawyer if it was legal but dude said I should go ahead and give it to them otherwise, they'll drag the case.

I wanted to transfer but the asked for cash. I gave them what they needed and they started tracking the CEO of the company.

The day we were to make the arrest, those thieves told me they were hungry and can't go hungry. I had to give them 10k to buy food.

Now the interesting part was, after the arrest, the man paid 50% of the money and wrote an undertaking that he'll pay the balance at the end of the month, When I was about to leave, the IPO in charge told me that 10% of what the man paid was theirs.
I was shocked and called my lawyer immediately, the idiot told me I should give it to them that that's how the operate.

The real estate company later paid the balance and I called my lawyer to close the case.

Few days later, the IPO called me that I should find him something for helping me recover my money, omo! I told him to wait that I don't have network for transfer, Immediately he dropped the call, I blocked all his lines

If you have a case, it's better you call and beg the person than going to the police

SeeWahala:
This op has been opening threads back to back since yesterday, and for what?

Because I am arranging to get him arrested for aiding and abetting examination malpractice on a huge scale by taking money from students undergoing university studies (bachelors and doctorates) to start and finish their final year project and dissertation topics then handing it over to them to take to their various schools to submit and gain points to and graduate.

He is a very bad person who helps people fake their graduation by using external mercenaries to complete academic work. It is against the law. Nobody should beg on his behalf once his name and story hits this nairaland front page.

If you are one of those who has ever utilized his dubious and criminal services in the past then I'm sorry you will also be swept away by the avalanche that is coming to him.

Ah ah! See Wahala!

DemonSlayer:


Ah ah! See Wahala!

I am already working with my team on his case. He will be used as a scapegoat and if seun the owner of this forum isn't careful he too will be swept by this litigation for accepting payment to sponsor academic malpractice and fraud on nairaland.

The high ranking police officers are involved in the extortion, hence no matter how the citizens cry, police wont stop extortion.

Perfect example, take a look at Onitsha - Asaba Niger bridge, the extortion going on there by the police is very massive. And due to the extortion, there is always hold up on the Asaba axis of the brdge. Despite all these and numerous calls by the citizens to dismantle those road blocks, they still wont dismantle it.

Sageez:
Those thieves are really not your friend.

I bought a land from a real estate company only, they gave me all relevant documents but kept postponing their allocation. After waiting for more than 7 months, I was advised to get the police involved.

I immediately ed a lawyer who wrote a petition and the case was one IPO.

First thing, they asked me to to pay 250k to mobilize them, I asked my lawyer if it was legal but dude said I should go ahead and give it to them otherwise, they'll drag the case.

I wanted to transfer but the asked for cash. I gave them what they needed and they started tracking the CEO of the company.

The day we were to make the arrest, those thieves told me they were hungry and can't go hungry. I had to give them 10k to buy food.

Now the interesting part was, after the arrest, the man paid 50% of the money and wrote an undertaking that he'll pay the balance at the end of the month, When I was about to leave, the IPO in charge told me that 10% of what the man paid was theirs.
I was shocked and called my lawyer immediately, the idiot told me I should give it to them that that's how the operate.

The real estate company later paid the balance and I called my lawyer to close the case.

Few days later, the IPO called me that I should find him something for helping me recover my money, omo! I told him to wait that I don't have network for transfer, Immediately he dropped the call, I blocked all his lines

If you have a case, it's better you call and beg the person than going to the police

Hope you no longer use that lawyer, eh?

TONYE001:


Hope you no longer use that lawyer, eh?

I dropped him after the case.

I don't take any case to Police station, they are bunch of criminals in uniform

nah mumu dey go Nigerian Police station go report em stolen fone....

izz long gone brah
OTILOR in capital letters!

Mugu must fall for guyman to chop...

I hate Nigeria police

What a shame! The police that should be the promoter of fairness and justice now the seller of justice to the highest bidder. What a shame! The police that should be the go to place for refuge is now the crocodile that swallows the vulnerable.
I pray and hope to see all of these turn around for good, hope to see a time when Nigerians will be proud of the force.

SeeWahala:
This op has been opening threads back to back since yesterday, and for what?

Because I am arranging to get him arrested for aiding and abetting examination malpractice on a huge scale by taking money from students undergoing university studies (bachelors and doctorates) to start and finish their final year project and dissertation topics then handing it over to them to take to their various schools to submit and gain points to and graduate.

He is a very bad person who helps people fake their graduation by using external mercenaries to complete academic work. It is against the law. Nobody should beg on his behalf once his name and story hits this nairaland front page.

If you are one of those who has ever utilized his dubious and criminal services in the past then I'm sorry you will also be swept away by the avalanche that is coming to him.

What a public nuisance. Bark harder.

SeeWahala:
This op has been opening threads back to back since yesterday, and for what?

Because I am arranging to get him arrested for aiding and abetting examination malpractice on a huge scale by taking money from students undergoing university studies (bachelors and doctorates) to start and finish their final year project and dissertation topics then handing it over to them to take to their various schools to submit and gain points to and graduate.

He is a very bad person who helps people fake their graduation by using external mercenaries to complete academic work. It is against the law. Nobody should beg on his behalf once his name and story hits this nairaland front page.

If you are one of those who has ever utilized his dubious and criminal services in the past then I'm sorry you will also be swept away by the avalanche that is coming to him.

useless bragging from people from that side

Nigeria never burn ooo n nnamdiot kanu is still eating watery beans steady

SeeWahala:
This op has been opening threads back to back since yesterday, and for what?

Because I am arranging to get him arrested for aiding and abetting examination malpractice on a huge scale by taking money from students undergoing university studies (bachelors and doctorates) to start and finish their final year project and dissertation topics then handing it over to them to take to their various schools to submit and gain points to and graduate.

He is a very bad person who helps people fake their graduation by using external mercenaries to complete academic work. It is against the law. Nobody should beg on his behalf once his name and story hits this nairaland front page.

If you are one of those who has ever utilized his dubious and criminal services in the past then I'm sorry you will also be swept away by the avalanche that is coming to him.

Must you constitute a nuisance before carrying out ur supposed action?

chatinent:
It would surprise you to know that these bribes and extortion they take, they remit to the oga at the top. Forget the televised "we are not aware-ism," they are aware, and they benefit... because they set a figure the junior officers MUST realise.


For example, there was a house I relocated to sometime. Let's assume I relocated in June, NEPA brought a bill for May. I mean a new house o. I questioned why bills for a month not used was given and how the figure was calculated since there was no usage. The official told me that the oga at the top always set a figure to be realised monthly and it's then divided. Prepaid metres may be expensive but it saves you...you no go know sha. Omo, we drag am sha. They threatened to cut the light and I was like "with all pleasure." Since they already saw I had solar s installed, renegotiations began.

Your story is how arm robber try to make police look bad.. do you know want let to ENDSAR never happened... It was a group of yahoo boy SARS was closed to get them that POSTED a video of what happened in SUDAN and immediately because Nigerians hate their police they started burning police stations and killed officers... If that thing happened can you tell me the name of the boy that was allegedly killed, his father's name and his village or where he was burried.. This is criminals says about police.