NewStats: 3,264,215 , 8,182,985 topics. Date: Tuesday, 10 June 2025 at 08:07 AM 4l5e2e

For sure. What concerns me with who her best friend is! If she like let her be best friend with a frog or a toad, i dont care!

Samantha125:
Then I'm sure he won't have issues with the woman also being best friends with either her own mother or father rather than him.

Hezzyluv:
Letting her know your balance. Most women will not rest till they see THE END.

Especially THIS.

Almost all of them.

Samantha125:
It's totally fine with me if a man wants to keep his balance private because that would mean that I also get to keep mine private as well...

Easy to say

Telling ur wife ur turnover,how much dey enter ur at the end of the month,she go turn house of assembly for ur budget 🤣

100 BILLION GALONS OF OIL DEY YOUR HEAD SIR.

Rubyjade:
Real Masculinity Builds, It Doesn’t Dominate.
Marriage isn’t a battle of power or survival. It’s a partnership. And while men do make mistakes in marriage — the real errors are often rooted in outdated thinking, pride, or fear. Let’s unpack this:

1. “A woman must love, a man must provide.”
False binary. Love and provision go both ways in a modern marriage. A woman can contribute. A man should show affection. Reducing relationships to transactions is why a lot of marriages feel like business contracts instead of emotional homes.

A man who only provides but doesn’t emotionally connect becomes a stranger in his own house.

And no — it’s not her job to chase you after marriage. If you stop pursuing your wife emotionally, someone else eventually might.

2. “You must always look like a god.”
Yes, personal hygiene and appearance matter — for both partners. But a healthy marriage allows space for comfort and vulnerability.
Looking good shouldn't be about fear of being left; it should be about self-respect and mutual attraction. If she’s only with you because of your beard oil and boxers, the problem is deeper than your look.

3. “You are the lord. Let her have a say, but have your way.”
Bro. That’s not strength — that’s domination disguised as leadership.

Real leadership listens.

Real men build with their wives, not over them.
Being decisive is good — being dismissive isn’t.

4. “She’s not a mind-reader.”
True. Communication matters. But it’s not just telling her what you want.
Try asking her what she needs, too. Love isn’t just about managing expectations — it’s about understanding and growing together.

5. “Women love conflict.”
No. They love connection. What looks like “random conflict” is often unmet needs or emotional disconnection.

Avoidance kills intimacy.

Mature couples face tough conversations together.
If you treat conflict as drama instead of dialogue, you’re missing the deeper issue.

6. “Prepare for the rainy day; never let your wife be the breadwinner.”
Prepare? YES.
Fear her success? NO.
If your masculinity collapses when your wife earns more, the issue is insecurity, not identity.

Strong men celebrate their partner’s wins.

Marriage is not a competition — it’s coverage. Some seasons you’ll earn more. Other seasons, she might. That’s life.

7. “She’s not your best friend.”
Why not?
If you can’t laugh, vent, dream, or be your full self with your wife — who are you even married to?
Friendship is the foundation of lasting love. You don’t lose your masculinity by being emotionally close — you lose it by being emotionally unavailable.

✨ FINAL WORD:
Real men lead, but they don’t lord.
They provide, but they also protect emotionally.
They pursue wisdom, not ego.
And they build with their wives, not just expect to be served by them.

We need less alpha performance, and more emotional maturity in marriages today.
You don’t lose your role by listening — you strengthen it.

Hezzyluv:
Letting her know your balance. Most women will not rest till they see THE END.

na dis one be the most important of dem all

Baba I suppose buy u fish n some bottles of cold beer for dis write up!
Na OG u b!!!

Samantha125:
It's totally fine with me if a man wants to keep his balance private because that would mean that I also get to keep mine private as well...

How much women dey make for a month ? Na coins for where men money dey

Your wife is definitely not your best friend

Samantha125:
If the wife is not his best friend, then who's his best friend?

His mother or father I guess.

Gz opinion doesn't matter..

allthingsgood:
When it comes to Marriage, it’s common for men (and pretty much everyone) to mess up at some point. Whether it’s a lack of communication or a lapse in judgment, navigating a relationship requires a certain level of self-awareness. Here are some prevalent mistakes men make in marriage:

1. It is a woman's duty to love, it is a man's duty to provide
A man who continuously shows affection, without anything concrete is just sitting on time bomb and wasting his time. If she is not already cheating, she will eventually leave u in frustration. Women are complex, they are to be chased before marriage. After marriage, allow her to do the chasing. Focus on providing and protecting, that is your job as a man.

2. Letting your appearance suffer
When you first started dating her, you were probably extremely aware of how you looked, smelled, and presented yourself. But now? You walk around donning your dirty boxers upandan. Okay na, she will soon get tired and leave. A woman needs to see her husband as her god. So dont get too comfortable, or she will disconnect from you.

3. Take charge
You are the lord. Allow your wife to have her say, but you must have your way. She will secretly love you even more. No woman likes an indecisive man. Be a problem solver, not weak slub.

4. Expecting your partner to be a mind-reader
Bros, women arent prophets or psychics. Sometimes even if she has an idea what you mean, she just needs to hear the words. Dont just send money to your wife without giving specific instructions/information. You will have done nothing! Tell her exactly what you mean and what you want.

5. Avoiding conflict like the plague
We get it, no one likes fighting. It’s stressful and just all around not a good time. But conflict is pretty much a given in any relationship, besides it’s how you handle it that matters. So if you find yourself leaving whenever an argument starts to brew or just nodding to appease your partner, you’re being avoidant. Your partner wants to know how you feel and you should want to know how they feel, too! Also sometimes, women like conflict for no apparent reason, they can be that ridiculous. But its there way of seeking attention.

6. Prepare for the rainy day
Dont count on your wife to rescue you when things go bad, especially financially. You may be lucky that she does, but dont count on it. The only person who will probably accept you no matter what is your mother, so treat her well. You wife will begin to show signs when things get tough, and may eventually dump you. The biggest disaster is allow a woman become your breadwinner. My brother you are done for!

7. Your wife is not your best friend
Bro get it together. She is your wife and partner, not your best friend. Forget mumu woke generation


Add yours

No 1 is wrong
Anyone that has the means can provide

No gender came on earth with money

My brother..... Like "The End" with Dot dot dot dot..........

Hezzyluv:
Letting her know your balance. Most women will not rest till they see THE END.

jesmond3945:
guy that means you didnt marry a good woman. Just leave the marriage because it is going to crash. Imagine playing mind games with your wife.

My brother it's not about a good woman or a bad one. A woman is a woman. Trust me. You don't tell her everything. If you have been doing that stop it. One day u will I told you this. Telling her everything isn't a sign of love. Anyway experience they say is the best teacher. I hope you don't learn negatively.

Samantha125:
You're not making any sense...

You'll find out some day who's making sense or not. Congratulations!!!

I can relate with no 2&4 but saying your wife is not your bestie, Omo I disagree. If your wife can't be your bestie, then you should not be in the marriage, cos you will be in soup. I mean hot one. I am talking from experience. My wife is my all. Ayanfe mi.

ZaddyJ:

Very good comment , sometimes when you follow advice of naysayers who are yet to experience marriage you will end up detesting a woman who has shown you unadulterated love.
My wife is not reading my comment and is not here , so I won’t say any bad thing about her so I don’t incur the wrath of God. I’m in America today solely because of her. So why will I follow this God forsaken rules that won’t help me but destroy my beautiful marriage ?

My brother some women with beautiful heart are still out there waiting for a man that will love them comionately . just like how we have some evil men who benefitted more from a woman yet still dump them .

Just like you said do what keep peace in your home .

My brother, if you like your marriage ehh, just read and on nairaland..Men here are kindergarten

Number 1 is absolutely wrong. Its a man's duty to love and a woman's duty to submit. because a man can not provide without having love, likewise a woman can not love without submitting. This is the number one rule of marriage.

allthingsgood:


Go and read your bible properly before u misquote what u dont know

Ephesians 5:22-24 says what?

I disagree with some of your points.

It's a man's duty to love AND provide.

Decisions should be made together. What matters is making the right decision. There's no shame in a man itting his mistakes.

A woman who won't be there for his man during financial hardship shouldn't be his wife in the first place.

Your wife should be your best friend. Those kinds of marriages are the healthiest and happiest I've ever seen.

allthingsgood:
When it comes to Marriage, it’s common for men (and pretty much everyone) to mess up at some point. Whether it’s a lack of communication or a lapse in judgment, navigating a relationship requires a certain level of self-awareness. Here are some prevalent mistakes men make in marriage:

1. It is a woman's duty to love, it is a man's duty to provide
A man who continuously shows affection, without anything concrete is just sitting on time bomb and wasting his time. If she is not already cheating, she will eventually leave u in frustration. Women are complex, they are to be chased before marriage. After marriage, allow her to do the chasing. Focus on providing and protecting, that is your job as a man.

2. Letting your appearance suffer
When you first started dating her, you were probably extremely aware of how you looked, smelled, and presented yourself. But now? You walk around donning your dirty boxers upandan. Okay na, she will soon get tired and leave. A woman needs to see her husband as her god. So dont get too comfortable, or she will disconnect from you.

3. Take charge
You are the lord. Allow your wife to have her say, but you must have your way. She will secretly love you even more. No woman likes an indecisive man. Be a problem solver, not weak slub.

4. Expecting your partner to be a mind-reader
Bros, women arent prophets or psychics. Sometimes even if she has an idea what you mean, she just needs to hear the words. Dont just send money to your wife without giving specific instructions/information. You will have done nothing! Tell her exactly what you mean and what you want.

5. Avoiding conflict like the plague
We get it, no one likes fighting. It’s stressful and just all around not a good time. But conflict is pretty much a given in any relationship, besides it’s how you handle it that matters. So if you find yourself leaving whenever an argument starts to brew or just nodding to appease your partner, you’re being avoidant. Your partner wants to know how you feel and you should want to know how they feel, too! Also sometimes, women like conflict for no apparent reason, they can be that ridiculous. But its there way of seeking attention.

6. Prepare for the rainy day
Dont count on your wife to rescue you when things go bad, especially financially. You may be lucky that she does, but dont count on it. The only person who will probably accept you no matter what is your mother, so treat her well. You wife will begin to show signs when things get tough, and may eventually dump you. The biggest disaster is allow a woman become your breadwinner. My brother you are done for!

7. Your wife is not your best friend
Bro get it together. She is your wife and partner, not your best friend. Forget mumu woke generation


Add yours

Very well written 👏👏👏👏👏

This should have been the first post.

Thank you for taking the time to educate people here. Unfortunately, many may have only seen the first post and not scrolled down enough to see yours.

Rubyjade:
Real Masculinity Builds, It Doesn’t Dominate.
Marriage isn’t a battle of power or survival. It’s a partnership. And while men do make mistakes in marriage — the real errors are often rooted in outdated thinking, pride, or fear. Let’s unpack this:

1. “A woman must love, a man must provide.”
False binary. Love and provision go both ways in a modern marriage. A woman can contribute. A man should show affection. Reducing relationships to transactions is why a lot of marriages feel like business contracts instead of emotional homes.

A man who only provides but doesn’t emotionally connect becomes a stranger in his own house.

And no — it’s not her job to chase you after marriage. If you stop pursuing your wife emotionally, someone else eventually might.

2. “You must always look like a god.”
Yes, personal hygiene and appearance matter — for both partners. But a healthy marriage allows space for comfort and vulnerability.
Looking good shouldn't be about fear of being left; it should be about self-respect and mutual attraction. If she’s only with you because of your beard oil and boxers, the problem is deeper than your look.

3. “You are the lord. Let her have a say, but have your way.”
Bro. That’s not strength — that’s domination disguised as leadership.

Real leadership listens.

Real men build with their wives, not over them.
Being decisive is good — being dismissive isn’t.

4. “She’s not a mind-reader.”
True. Communication matters. But it’s not just telling her what you want.
Try asking her what she needs, too. Love isn’t just about managing expectations — it’s about understanding and growing together.

5. “Women love conflict.”
No. They love connection. What looks like “random conflict” is often unmet needs or emotional disconnection.

Avoidance kills intimacy.

Mature couples face tough conversations together.
If you treat conflict as drama instead of dialogue, you’re missing the deeper issue.

6. “Prepare for the rainy day; never let your wife be the breadwinner.”
Prepare? YES.
Fear her success? NO.
If your masculinity collapses when your wife earns more, the issue is insecurity, not identity.

Strong men celebrate their partner’s wins.

Marriage is not a competition — it’s coverage. Some seasons you’ll earn more. Other seasons, she might. That’s life.

7. “She’s not your best friend.”
Why not?
If you can’t laugh, vent, dream, or be your full self with your wife — who are you even married to?
Friendship is the foundation of lasting love. You don’t lose your masculinity by being emotionally close — you lose it by being emotionally unavailable.

✨ FINAL WORD:
Real men lead, but they don’t lord.
They provide, but they also protect emotionally.
They pursue wisdom, not ego.
And they build with their wives, not just expect to be served by them.

We need less alpha performance, and more emotional maturity in marriages today.
You don’t lose your role by listening — you strengthen it.

7arrows:


My brother it's not about a good woman or a bad one. A woman is a woman. Trust me. You don't tell her everything. If you have been doing that stop it. One day u will I told you this. Telling her everything isn't a sign of love. Anyway experience they say is the best teacher. I hope you don't learn negatively.

not true my brother. Women are different. Of course you have a mother, are you telling me your dad was never open to her? You guys cant take your experience while growing and paint a brush that all women are the same. I have been married for 11 years myself

allthingsgood:
When it comes to Marriage, it’s common for men (and pretty much everyone) to mess up at some point. Whether it’s a lack of communication or a lapse in judgment, navigating a relationship requires a certain level of self-awareness. Here are some prevalent mistakes men make in marriage:

1. It is a woman's duty to love, it is a man's duty to provide
A man who continuously shows affection, without anything concrete is just sitting on time bomb and wasting his time. If she is not already cheating, she will eventually leave u in frustration. Women are complex, they are to be chased before marriage. After marriage, allow her to do the chasing. Focus on providing and protecting, that is your job as a man.

2. Letting your appearance suffer
When you first started dating her, you were probably extremely aware of how you looked, smelled, and presented yourself. But now? You walk around donning your dirty boxers upandan. Okay na, she will soon get tired and leave. A woman needs to see her husband as her god. So dont get too comfortable, or she will disconnect from you.

3. Take charge
You are the lord. Allow your wife to have her say, but you must have your way. She will secretly love you even more. No woman likes an indecisive man. Be a problem solver, not weak slub.

4. Expecting your partner to be a mind-reader
Bros, women arent prophets or psychics. Sometimes even if she has an idea what you mean, she just needs to hear the words. Dont just send money to your wife without giving specific instructions/information. You will have done nothing! Tell her exactly what you mean and what you want.

5. Avoiding conflict like the plague
We get it, no one likes fighting. It’s stressful and just all around not a good time. But conflict is pretty much a given in any relationship, besides it’s how you handle it that matters. So if you find yourself leaving whenever an argument starts to brew or just nodding to appease your partner, you’re being avoidant. Your partner wants to know how you feel and you should want to know how they feel, too! Also sometimes, women like conflict for no apparent reason, they can be that ridiculous. But its there way of seeking attention.

6. Prepare for the rainy day
Dont count on your wife to rescue you when things go bad, especially financially. You may be lucky that she does, but dont count on it. The only person who will probably accept you no matter what is your mother, so treat her well. You wife will begin to show signs when things get tough, and may eventually dump you. The biggest disaster is allow a woman become your breadwinner. My brother you are done for!

7. Your wife is not your best friend
Bro get it together. She is your wife and partner, not your best friend. Forget mumu woke generation


Add yours

Prepare for the rainy day
Dont count on your wife to rescue you when things go bad, especially financially. You may be lucky that she does, but dont count on it. The only person who will probably accept you no matter what is your mother, so treat her well. You wife will begin to show signs when things get tough, and may eventually dump you. The biggest disaster is allow a woman become your breadwinner. My brother you are done for! cry

jesmond3945:
not true my brother. Women are different. Of course you have a mother, are you telling me your dad was never open to her? You guys cant take your experience while growing and paint a brush that all women are the same. I have been married for 11 years myself

Yes we have some exceptional women, maybe you are lucky that yours is among. So Keep telling your woman everything. Even tell her about your friends. I wish you good luck. Meanwhile I'm married for 17 years and still in marriage.

jesmond3945:
not true my brother. Women are different. Of course you have a mother, are you telling me your dad was never open to her? You guys cant take your experience while growing and paint a brush that all women are the same. I have been married for 11 years myself

Most of them lack basic knowledge despite being educated, how can some people will comfortably projecting their lives to others as general knowledge.

Samantha125:
If the wife is not his best friend, then who's his best friend?

I wonder oo!!!
She was even my best friend before we got married, nothing change still for more than a decade

allthingsgood:


There are wives of billionaires that sleep with security men

reason why if you read Million books on how to understand women, you still can't

bepositive11:
I disagree with some of your points.

It's a man's duty to love AND provide.

Decisions should be made together. What matters is making the right decision. There's no shame in a man itting his mistakes.

A woman who won't be there for his man during financial hardship shouldn't be his wife in the first place.

Your wife should be your best friend. Those kinds of marriages are the healthiest and happiest I've ever seen.

From your comment i can tell you are either a woman, or if u are a man, u have never been with a woman.

Rubyjade:
Real Masculinity Builds, It Doesn’t Dominate.
Marriage isn’t a battle of power or survival. It’s a partnership. And while men do make mistakes in marriage — the real errors are often rooted in outdated thinking, pride, or fear. Let’s unpack this:

1. “A woman must love, a man must provide.”
False binary. Love and provision go both ways in a modern marriage. A woman can contribute. A man should show affection. Reducing relationships to transactions is why a lot of marriages feel like business contracts instead of emotional homes.

A man who only provides but doesn’t emotionally connect becomes a stranger in his own house.

And no — it’s not her job to chase you after marriage. If you stop pursuing your wife emotionally, someone else eventually might.

2. “You must always look like a god.”
Yes, personal hygiene and appearance matter — for both partners. But a healthy marriage allows space for comfort and vulnerability.
Looking good shouldn't be about fear of being left; it should be about self-respect and mutual attraction. If she’s only with you because of your beard oil and boxers, the problem is deeper than your look.

3. “You are the lord. Let her have a say, but have your way.”
Bro. That’s not strength — that’s domination disguised as leadership.

Real leadership listens.

Real men build with their wives, not over them.
Being decisive is good — being dismissive isn’t.

4. “She’s not a mind-reader.”
True. Communication matters. But it’s not just telling her what you want.
Try asking her what she needs, too. Love isn’t just about managing expectations — it’s about understanding and growing together.

5. “Women love conflict.”
No. They love connection. What looks like “random conflict” is often unmet needs or emotional disconnection.

Avoidance kills intimacy.

Mature couples face tough conversations together.
If you treat conflict as drama instead of dialogue, you’re missing the deeper issue.

6. “Prepare for the rainy day; never let your wife be the breadwinner.”
Prepare? YES.
Fear her success? NO.
If your masculinity collapses when your wife earns more, the issue is insecurity, not identity.

Strong men celebrate their partner’s wins.

Marriage is not a competition — it’s coverage. Some seasons you’ll earn more. Other seasons, she might. That’s life.

7. “She’s not your best friend.”
Why not?
If you can’t laugh, vent, dream, or be your full self with your wife — who are you even married to?
Friendship is the foundation of lasting love. You don’t lose your masculinity by being emotionally close — you lose it by being emotionally unavailable.

✨ FINAL WORD:
Real men lead, but they don’t lord.
They provide, but they also protect emotionally.
They pursue wisdom, not ego.
And they build with their wives, not just expect to be served by them.

We need less alpha performance, and more emotional maturity in marriages today.
You don’t lose your role by listening — you strengthen it.

Love your write-up and contribution!

allthingsgood:


From your comment i can tell you are either a woman, or if u are a man, u have never been with a woman.

Not all men are the same.

allthingsgood Read this well written comment again.

It's a shame you can't understand men can have secure and healthy relationships with a woman.

I hope you experience it yourself someday.

Rubyjade:
Real Masculinity Builds, It Doesn’t Dominate.
Marriage isn’t a battle of power or survival. It’s a partnership. And while men do make mistakes in marriage — the real errors are often rooted in outdated thinking, pride, or fear. Let’s unpack this:

1. “A woman must love, a man must provide.”
False binary. Love and provision go both ways in a modern marriage. A woman can contribute. A man should show affection. Reducing relationships to transactions is why a lot of marriages feel like business contracts instead of emotional homes.

A man who only provides but doesn’t emotionally connect becomes a stranger in his own house.

And no — it’s not her job to chase you after marriage. If you stop pursuing your wife emotionally, someone else eventually might.

2. “You must always look like a god.”
Yes, personal hygiene and appearance matter — for both partners. But a healthy marriage allows space for comfort and vulnerability.
Looking good shouldn't be about fear of being left; it should be about self-respect and mutual attraction. If she’s only with you because of your beard oil and boxers, the problem is deeper than your look.

3. “You are the lord. Let her have a say, but have your way.”
Bro. That’s not strength — that’s domination disguised as leadership.

Real leadership listens.

Real men build with their wives, not over them.
Being decisive is good — being dismissive isn’t.

4. “She’s not a mind-reader.”
True. Communication matters. But it’s not just telling her what you want.
Try asking her what she needs, too. Love isn’t just about managing expectations — it’s about understanding and growing together.

5. “Women love conflict.”
No. They love connection. What looks like “random conflict” is often unmet needs or emotional disconnection.

Avoidance kills intimacy.

Mature couples face tough conversations together.
If you treat conflict as drama instead of dialogue, you’re missing the deeper issue.

6. “Prepare for the rainy day; never let your wife be the breadwinner.”
Prepare? YES.
Fear her success? NO.
If your masculinity collapses when your wife earns more, the issue is insecurity, not identity.

Strong men celebrate their partner’s wins.

Marriage is not a competition — it’s coverage. Some seasons you’ll earn more. Other seasons, she might. That’s life.

7. “She’s not your best friend.”
Why not?
If you can’t laugh, vent, dream, or be your full self with your wife — who are you even married to?
Friendship is the foundation of lasting love. You don’t lose your masculinity by being emotionally close — you lose it by being emotionally unavailable.

✨ FINAL WORD:
Real men lead, but they don’t lord.
They provide, but they also protect emotionally.
They pursue wisdom, not ego.
And they build with their wives, not just expect to be served by them.

We need less alpha performance, and more emotional maturity in marriages today.
You don’t lose your role by listening — you strengthen it.