NewStats: 3,264,203 , 8,182,952 topics. Date: Tuesday, 10 June 2025 at 07:26 AM 1ud4r

marriage no get rule.

Whats stops u from learning new things

people start jobs and learn everything about the job right there but in marriage you are saying it wont work why?

It happens...

....and that's supposed to be one of the "valid" reasons for a divorce?

iamnotillicit:
Who washes a sneaker in a washing machine...

It takes days to dry that way

A dumbo

Boys in the game of men will always get eliminated.

OP, why asking him jamb question if she cooks for him or not when dating

GboyegaD:
I wondered what they were doing while courting not to have discussed roles and expectations in the home. Should he choose to remarry, he should what courtship is for.

They were nacking, going to the movies and asking each other "have you eaten?"

The same African marriages require a husband to be the sole provider of his household, yet you guys nowadays have issues with it and want your women to be sharing your responsibilities with you.

tiswell:
African marriages traditionally requires a wife to cook,wash and take care of domestic front.


We are not Beyonce and Jay z

People normalize bad behaviors and basic ethics and then blame marriage when the consequences of their bad deeds catches up with them.

How can someone not know how to cook or do basic hygiene as washing?


Too many handsome guys and beautiful ladies on the outside / social media but lives like pigs and swines in their various houses..

Omo am sure the guy wasn’t pissed she wasn’t doing anything in the house but the fact she has proven to be useless and dumb ,how do you throw a snickers inside a washing machine ,how can you be lousy dumb and heartless / insensitive selfish at same time ,who does that ,Omo intelligence is a big criteria for me

Samantha125:
The same African marriages require a husband to be the sole provider of his household, yet you guys nowadays have issues with it and want your women to be sharing your responsibilities with you.

Now that's stereotype.

African men still provides sufficiently for their families,just that the present generation of women canvassed for gender equality where and when it favours them.

DaGC:
Despite religious teachings, courtship usually is how to know if partners are compatible. He learnt the hard way. 18 months is kinda short for a marriage though, hopefully they didn't bring a kid into a now broken home during that period.

Better luck to them in their future relationship/marriage.

When you say couples should co-habitat together before marriage, you will hear yen yen yen.

What am dealing with in my re relationship is my girl not having the mind of hers and always seeking for validation,so many girls are like that and if you ever find a girl that’s not like that ,she’s one so serious heck of a person ,my girl this days get influenced by her stupid narcissistic and feminist self acclaimed feminist sister who is single and can’t live in peace with her own mom .she visited the elder sister who’s married and was always complaining how the sister serves the husband and feel is not right and her sister is not complaining ,now she discusses this with my girl and my girl always pick up a bad character when ever she talks with this particular sister of hers ,meanwhile she cooks and serve her own man but tell others they being used as servants,how would a lady see washing her Man’s wear and cooking for him as slavery ,I have decided am not marrying her anymore

Kobojunkie:
Yes, you can wash many types of sneakers in the washing machine, but it's important to take certain precautions to avoid damage. Generally, sneakers made of canvas, nylon, cotton, and polyester are safe to machine wash. There is nothing dumb about that move.

Never heard of it before. What precautions do you need to take?

Bro, being one's brother's keeper most times often backfires.

It's like taking Panadol for another person's headache.

You were blunt to your friend by telling him the obvious truth; but he would have none of it and sought solace by blocking you.

Next time, you would learn to tread more carefully!



@hotseat

I once asked a lady why she married someone else her reply was very shocking.
Her reply was that he has money enough to feed her and her children. The most shocking about it was her response when I asked her what if his hustle collapses as nobody knows tomorrow.
You know her response....
Your guess is good as mine because I expected to hear that.

Whenever I see the unfortunate husband who thought he hit a jackpot, I look at him with pity because he thought he married tear rubber but he didn't know that it was a Nigerian used and abused he married ready to be abused further by another.

Samantha125:
Why divorce when he could've taken it upon himself to perform those responsiblities since he met her like that?

Beyonce can't cook, but it's her husband Jay Z who does the cooking whenever he's around and their marriage will be 17 years old this year... Communication is the greatest factor in a relationship.

It was her husband that told her to stop cooking because she is a terrible cook, It is not like she isn't making any attempt or too lazy to cook and who told you she haven't make any improvements all these years?

Even if you can't do something you have to make efforts in relationship so that your partner can know you care, communication is useless if it is just all words and no action and you can't compare average people relationship to Jay Z and Beyonce they are rich enough to hire chefs and cleaners and their career may keep them busy not to even have time for those.

Jay Z also cheated on Beyonce and she chose to forgave him.

As he delete you, remain deleted
Why is it bothering you abi you still get more pain to rub in his face....
Guy is already facing reality, stop pointing out his errors.
Help him to recover quicker and pick up his battered and tattered life please.

Look no one is smart enough to notice all things before marriage...Even if you do, love and some other factors including(i have to get married)might make you not to see them as big deals...

But for marriage to work, both party must learn to always improve on everything especially when your partner calls your attebtion to it.. Be ready for corrections and learn to communicate freely with respect for each other...

Many people hate corrections..I call them inferiority complex mindset sets of people...

This is the only way to hold a marriage in a loving else una go become roommates or divorce like your friend... Marriage will be extremely hard if these are not in place...And if both started off with quarreling and fights the marriage needs a lot of work to become sweet because the quarrel will stay in their psyche

As for you, i consider your word childish and that of someone who is not married..If you are married you would know that those words are very insensitive to your friend who might have so many other things that is making him angry about his ex...

Marriage is one kind of a wrong arrangement for men especially

Just go to the romance section and you'll see a pile of threads from your brothers complaining and shaming women for not sharing their responsibilities as the providers.

tiswell:
Now that's stereotype.

African men still provides sufficiently for their families,just that the present generation of women canvassed for gender equality where and when it favours them.

Can you your claim with issible evidence?

dontai:
you lied!

During courtship, if your gf is lazy to cook, clean ro do house chores, then you can decide if you xan live with that and get a maid or get another gf.

Courtship is very important including sexual compatibility

advanceDNA:
So if we are not having sex before marriage... I am not supposed to expect sex in marriage??

there some basics that should be in marriage without g an affidavit and police report about it during courtship...... I mean..... why would someone not cook and clean in their own home...?? Y'all just like making marriage look harder than it is

Man saw she could not do lots of things, and he thought...I can change her.

A lot of marriages end because one of the copule thought that 'I can change my significant other'..

Exactly, I agree with you absolutely. The red flag you ignore can never go away even if she claims to be woman of God.

Do you live with them to know that she's improved? And how was she a terrible cook?

MoneyMan5:


It was her husband that told her to stop cooking because she is a terrible cook, It is not like she isn't making any attempt or too lazy to cook and who told you she haven't make any improvements all these years?

Even if you can't do something you have to make efforts in relationship so that your partner can know you care, communication is useless if it is just all words and no action.

Jay Z also cheated on Beyonce and she chose to forgave him.

Samantha125:
Just go to the romance section and you'll see a pile of threads from your brothers complaining and shaming women for not sharing their responsibilities as the providers.

Random comments from some faceless individuals isn't enough to draw your premise to a logical conclusion.

Most of those supposed brothers in romance section are teenagers feeding off their parents.

Chilipepper:
Man shares why his friend blocked him on social media following discussion about why he divorced his wife.



https://x.com/Chrisllionaire/status/1929912597148525003?t=D-zPbhzPI06X5WHxvc3kTQ&s=19

If indeed Ur story is true, I will beg you to run away from such toxic friend, he has anger issue, a type that hates truth and always think he is correct.

Samantha125:
Why divorce when he could've taken it upon himself to perform those responsiblities since he met her like that?

Beyonce can't cook, but it's her husband Jay Z who does the cooking whenever he's around and their marriage will be 17 years old this year... Communication is the greatest factor in a relationship.

You are right to some extent.but one thing I hate is when you take it upon yourself to assist in domestic shores most ladies will relax and begin to see it as the man's responsibility.Some are unteachable no matter how you try to teach or train them on basic domestic duties.
This duty about cooking is never a man's responsibility since after creation.it is a fundamental role of a woman.A man can occassionally breeze in and prepare meal if he feel like doing.Originally,GOD did not design a man to be a cook rather he designed a woman to be soft help mate.
Help mate means doing basic home shores like cooking,taking care of kids,to an extent washing,cleaning the house,attending to things that require their natural duties as women.

Britishpea:
Look no one is smart enough to notice all things before marriage...Even if you do, love and some other factors including(i have to get married)might make you not to see them as big deals...

But for marriage to work, both party must learn to always improve on everything especially when your partner calls your attebtion to it.. Be ready for corrections and learn to communicate freely with respect for each other...

Many people hate corrections..I call them inferiority complex mindset sets of people...

This is the only way to hold a marriage in a loving else una go become roommates or divorce like your friend... Marriage will be extremely hard if these are not in place...And if both started off with quarreling and fights the marriage needs a lot of work to become sweet because the quarrel will stay in their psyche

As for you, i consider your word childish and that of someone who is not married..If you are married you would know that those words are very insensitive to your friend who might have so many other things that is making him angry about his ex...

Marriage is one kind of a wrong arrangement for men especially

I went back to read and re-read the story, I still don't know where OP goes wrong by calling him childish, ...in fact, it seems you and Op's friend share similar trait,.... type of friends who won't like to hear truth from his friends and family.

Let me tell you fact... Yoruba usually says "the owner of story usually have deaf ear( eti oloro ma n di ni) if your friends cannot be telling you exactly of situations, who would tell you?

OP friend has whole lots of faults in this story and if the story is exactly the way it was told, it still not enough to let go of a marriage.

She didn't do house chores while dating may not mean she can't do them at all or in marriage so it depends on how they dated but there are discussion u can have while dating to know these things or trash them out.